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I've said previously in my review of a recent batch of Papaya that it's rare you get a strain that smells better than the fruit for which it is named. Well, turns out that maybe it's not so rare because this batch of Strawnana from Exotic Blooms has an insanely fruity bouquet that is a spot-on amalgamation of strawberry and banana aromas. Honestly, it smells better than my wife's strawberry banana smoothies! You may have had your share of varietals that claim to be of "banana" essence. Banana OG, for example, is fairly common and usually pretty good, however, I don't think i've ever smoked/vaped it and said "Wow, that really tastes like banana". That's certainly not the case with this Strawnana - a cross of the classic Banana Kush and Strawberry Bubblegum. It absolutely has not just the aroma of banana (and strawberry), but also the flavor. Aside from the phenomenally exotic aroma and flavor, I also found the cerebral nature of this flower's buzz to be quite remarkable. Usually with heavy indicas like this one (70/30) your mind begins to wander in a bit of a sporadic fashion. Let's face it, mental clarity, while frequently enhanced with sativas, is not the forte of indicas. Yet, what I noticed with this specimen is that even though my body was supremely relaxed, my mind was acute and, perhaps, even heightened. There was certainly a heady sense of creativity across my active mind - which is always helpful for writing 😉 . Visually this batch can be identified as very fresh - the trichomes are all still insanely starry and have been gradually fading to bright white. It's also quite dense and ridiculously sticky. It's obvious that it was extremely well cultivated when you consider the symmetrical structure, overtly large calyxes, and the sheer size of the trichome clusters (as seen in the macro photo below). Overall, I would encourage you to select this weed if you are looking for a stupendously exotic flavor experience, a mellow but active-minded buzz, or a super strong indica that won't leave you couch-locked. Hit up Exotic Blooms today to give this connoisseur-worthy batch of Strawnana a try for yourself!

Greetings my nighttime indica tokers. As an early riser, I had to stay up a bit late for this one, but it sure is a stupendous treat to share this Garanamal from Exotic Blooms with you. As you may or may not know I like to partake in the strains I review during, or just before, the review process. In this case, the whole before aspect has left me with a quite a difficult task ahead. That is to say that this highly indica dominant strain has me effectively couch-locked, computer on chest, trying to type out this review to you with out drooling on my keyboard to much. So yeah, as you might have guessed this one is a pretty epic strain. Its lineage is that of Grape Ape and the ever enjoyable Animal Cookies and this is abundantly apparent in the incredible nutty, cookie-like taste. Yet, also present are exotically sweet, berry-esque notes. It kind of conjured memories of zoo cookies from elementary school years getting mixed with a fruit roll-up in your snack bag. Man I could go for a fruit roll-up right now. Where was I? Shit. Ok. So I'm feeling extreme euphoria, squinty eyes, cotton mouth, a halo-like headband feeling, perhaps some auditory hallucinations? Lemme come back to this... ...and we're back. A little more energy now. Still super toasty though. Let's give it another shot... From a cultivation standpoint, this batch is epically manicured from root to cola. Immediately remarkable is the unbelievable amount of starry trichomes ALL OVER these buds. They are so starry that the pictures don't just not do them justice, they actually mess with the lighting. It's hard to capture, but I think, even with a bit of blur you can get the idea. In the macro, with starriness tamed, the freshness and maturity of the trichomes at harvest is clear based on the sheer white and round globules of resin forming at the top. The density of this strain is also evident as you attempt to break what should be easily snap-able buds, and their stickiness quickly impedes the process. Definitely break out your sharpest grinder to assist! Overall, this is an other worldly indica worthy of the finest toker's pallet and tolerance. If you're looking for something on that end of the spectrum that will rise above the rest, treat you right, and consistently leave you in a blissfully tranquil state, Garanamal is where it's at. Give Exotic Blooms a shout ASAP to get some for yourself.

Good evening fellow tokers! The weed fairy has really been sprinkling her magic dust on the DC weed scene lately. What do I mean by that? Well, quite simply, there's just a bunch of really great weed floating around the District. Take, for example, the following Tropicana Cookies from Top Secret DC. When I reviewed the Peanut Butter Ice Cream Cake from Joint Delivery at the start of the weekend, I was so sure that it would be the best that I would see for at least a little while. After all, it's stupendously great and the flavor is inescapably delicious. Yet, put this Tropicana next to it and, well, it's just too hard to tell which one is better. What's easy to tell, however, is that the two of them together have been making for an epic Sunday! While the PB Ice Cream Cake is certainly more on the indica side of the house, the Tropicana actually runs significantly sativa. So right off the bat, the comparison is a bit like apples and oranges. Looking closely, though, an expert eye can easily see that each was grown in remarkably similar way. The trichome coverage, the crispness of the cure, the brilliant white versus dark purplish hues. Visually both are spectacular. If we ARE comparing apples and oranges, the Tropicana is most definitely the orange and, from an olfactory perspective, it rather ironically takes the cake. I have no idea how they get strains like this, and some of the Tangie I've had before, to smell and taste so close to a fresh, juicy tangerine. It's literally like they injected a gallon of fresh squeezed juice into each plant somehow. I'd also say that this citrusy-ness also impacts the buzz. It might sound ridiculous, but if there was ever a way to "feel" orange flavor, this should qualify. Upon exhale, this citrus flavor utterly dominates, but soon gives way to notes of sweet cookie. In the vape, the mouthwatering is inevitable. In the tube, you can still get a really strong sense of Tangerine. In the joint, it's just astounding the range of flavors that evolve over the course of the session - might be the best way to go here. A wondrous cross breed of Tangie and Girl Scout Cookies this strain does end up, as I mentioned, on the sativa side (probably 60/40). As such, it's probably best for daytime use, but that's not to say that nighttime use would be detrimental. In fact, I think it's great for keeping some energy going, but still being able to comfortably fall asleep. That makes this one an absolute goto for social activities imo. To partake in what is quite possibly the best citrus-oriented batch of weed I've ever had, give Top Secret DC a shout as fast as you can. This one surely won't last long!

UPDATE (9/25/20) - Note that we've just published our How to Get Weed in DC - The Definitive Guide. Please refer to it for the most thorough explanation of how the legal cannabis scene works in D.C. including DC Initiative 71 (I-71) and the District's Medicinal Marijuana program. Thanks so much to our friends over at Free Range Kings for making this awesome informational video. (and for letting us repost it)! We think this does a great job outlining the basics of the current regulations and how the Initiative-71 services operate. It's super easy to understand and visually appealing - right down to the cartoon digital scale 😂 ! If your friends are ever coming into town and wondering how the legal cannabis system works here in DC now you can simply share this video! Free Range Kings bills themselves as the "ultimate guide to unique and even sublime food and cannabis experiences" and they are "focused on local restaurants, dispensaries, and people in the cities they represent!" Be sure to check out their site for intriguing articles, reviews, and videos highlighting local cultures around food and cannabis. You can also follow them on Instagram @freerangekings.

STOP the presses! This one's a scoop. An exclusive that is. You heard it here first folks, tomorrow the infamous JD Flowers by Joint Delivery will release some of the most epic cannabis flower gifts this side of the Mississippi: Peanut Butter Ice Cream Cake. At Toker's Guide we've been granted backstage access to this star so you can check her out for yourselves - and all before she's even remotely available to the general public's eyes. What's that? You only want weed so loud you can hear its smell from across the room? Well you're in luck. From afar - debatable about just how many miles away - it's got animal lovers feeling sorry for the skunk that someone must have recently ran over nearby. Up close, it's creamy, buttery, delectably chronic weed. A cross of the mouth-watering Peanut Butter Breath, an evenly balanced hybrid and combination of Dosidos and Mendo Breath, with indica dominant Ice Cream Cake, this bud certainly has all the flavor you could want and then some. It's been exquisitely manicured as is obvious from the immaculately starry smathering of trichomes throughout along with a pleasantly crispy texture. When you break it up, if you look close, you can see little explosions of kief sent flying through the air as each stem snaps under your fingers. The coloration is an additional area of note with this specimen. The purple and blueish hues along with a remarkably pale green create a stark contrast accentuated by the aforementioned starry twinkles (apparently twinklyness isn't a word - but should be!). This batch is truly a connoisseur's dream. Tomorrow, when Joint Delivery officially launches this strain, you might need to hit them up a little early to secure your place in line. But, I promise it'll all be worth it once you have the chance to sample these phenomenal JD flowers for yourself! PS: for $10 off use promo code: "TokersGuide"

Hear Ye! Hear Ye! Attention all you concentrate loving tokers! Here's a special Sunday night edition of the Toker's Guide where we'd like to present to you some really royal badder. It goes by the name of King Louie OG of @dabviarsextracts and we've been graced with its presence thanks to the ever noble Exotic Blooms. The aroma that you waft up from this absolutely gorgeous specimen of live resin badder is its first indication of the quality at hand. The second is the ease with which it simply crumbles at the tip of your dab tool. It's almost hard to get it to stick to things. The final, and I suppose most obvious, indicator of quality when partaking in this concentrate is the CLEARLY kush dominated terpene profile that exudes from each exhale. Of course, I rip from an e-rig bubbler designed to enhance flavor, but the flavor experience of this offering is superior still. The effects are just crushing...in a good way that is. Strong indica vibes will almost immediately overtake you from spine and shoulders moving outward. The euphoria can be so intense it almost makes you shudder slightly at first...then, prepare to melt away losing all track of space and time. Toke this before a quiet yoga class and - you've been warned - you will most likely wake up drooling on yourself. This is your nighttime vegetate on the couch type of gift. That said, it could be a fun one for someone who is new to concentrate. Unlike a sativa or hybrid with a significant sativa stance, this isn't going to leave you feeling spun out. Most likely, you'll get incredible munchies, go to bed early, and wake up super refreshed. Now, that might be 14 hours later, but...hey...who doesn't like some great sleep? All joking aside, this is some serious connoisseur grade badder. The live resin aspect means that it's made from cryogenically frozen freshly harvested cannabis buds. By immediately freezing the plants all of the terpenes, some which are emitted and fully out of the plant within minutes/hours, are retained. Then the subsequent product is pressed under immense pressure and collected for further purification and processing. The crumbly nature of this "badder" means that it's most likely higher in THC content and lower in terpene oils, however, different plants sometimes produce waxier consistencies - these often become referred to as "butter" or "budder". For the regal experience of partaking in this flavorful and impressively powerful premium level concentrate please inquire with Exotic Blooms as soon as possible. It truly is a gift fit for a King! PS: GET $10 OFF with promo code: "Toker's Guide Sent Me"

"These are some serious cookies!" Or at least that's what my buddy said after taking a massive rip of these Denver Cookies from Exotic Blooms. I have to agree. Whoever thought to combine the lineages that are believed to make up this strain - Durban Poison X Girl Scout Cookies X an undisclosed OG - is a weed genius because this might be the perfect, slightly sativa heavy hybrid (roughly 60/40). The aroma is that of strong anise, much like the Durban Poison which we recently reviewed from Exotic Blooms (here), but mixed with notes of something exotic and sweet - hard to place, really. It's kind of like a lemon merengue pastry, but with more shocking effervescence. In the above and below images, you can certainly see SOME of the crazy coloration, but it really doesn't do it justice. There are almost tiger-like stripe patterns created by the contrast between the dark purple hues and the rampant rows of trichomes on trichomes. It's something of an exotic brindle - the kind you might find on a cannabis seed of similar caliber. Under the macro, this specimen is simply fantastic to explore. The golden OOOOooozing resin coming from the tips of the buds tells you all you need to know about how well this grow was tended to. The structure is that ideal brittle, but still sticky enough to give super glue a run for its money. You pretty much can't roll this in a joint by the way. At least not right away. And it's definitely not wet, it's that resin ooze again - you gotta grind, let her chill and breathe for bit, then try to roll up. Still, good luck with that. For me, this one is reserved for the vape and water pipe only! With energy and euphoric feels galore, even the most seasoned and high tolerance tokers will find this bud possesses an immensely enjoyable and long lasting buzz. For those who medicate with cannabis, as I do, you may find this to be a real go-to in cases where other strains just aren't cutting it, and this is especially true in situations that call for energy and alertness. We haven't talked much about entourage effects on the Toker's Guide yet (an article is forthcoming), but this one seems to carry something of a full medicine cabinet around with it. For now, let's just say I'm very, very impressed by this bud's effects. Overall, I give this one an A+ and Five Stars - full marks across the board. To check out some Denver Cookies for yourself, hit up Exotic Blooms ASAP!

Won’t you join me fellow tokers as we take a trip through time! As many of you will surely remember, several winters ago we faced a wave of pulmonary lung injuries throughout the land. The common denominator connecting those poor souls suffering thusly was unfortunately linked to vape carts. At a time when the foundling medicinal and recreational cannabis culture had widely embraced vape carts for their convenience and ease of use, suddenly those same carts were being blamed for pneumonia like symptoms. I myself had been enthusiastically using carts, and fortunately I never fell ill, but was no less concerned… As it turned out, the culprit wasn’t so much the carts themselves as it was the producers thereof. Shady McShadesters throughout the land had been mass producing poor quality carts that were cut with various oils unfit for vaporization and inhalation in a greedy bid to increase profits. Carts had enjoyed a meteoric rise in popularity and seemed to be the future of the industry, only to just as quickly fall from grace due to the scandal. So what’s a Toker to do?!? I love extracts and concentrates, but I’m not a fan of the labor required for their use. I don’t care for the equipment involved in dabbing, nor do I care for the maintenance thereof. Plus I’m always on the go! Can’t someone trustworthy make me a top shelf, luxury cart that WON’T give me a prolific lung injury?!? Where are our heroes in our time of need?!? Enter DMV Organics! Possibly my favorite DC based i-71 compliant provider! Here to save us all from bunk carts with their brand new line of top shelf luxury concentrate and extract based carts! The cart I myself tried was the Orange Crush Diamond with D-Limonene Terps Cart. Firstly; the cart itself is a lead free certified glass cart with a ceramic atomizer. The quality of this cart absolutely enhances the Toker’s experience, ease of use, and flavor. But what about the contents therein you ask?!? It's, in fact, the same Orange Crush Diamonds we reviewed recently (here), but blended for ideal use in a cart. I must say, I don’t know of anyone in DC currently producing a cart of similar quality. Freshly harvested cannabis typically yields a saucier, terpene rich concentrate which provides the Toker with a flavorful experience. THC-A crystalline, or THC-A diamonds are a relatively new addition to the world of concentrates. Known for their incredible potency yielding a euphoric, uplifting experience, Diamonds can be four times as strong as flower! The Orange Crush Diamonds boast 86.6% THC, 3% CBD, and I haven’t even mentioned the D-Limonene Terps yet!!! To enhance the magical citrus flavor that I adore, D-Limonene Terps have been added to this amazing cart. Limonene is a Terpene found in numerous cannabis strains and is the one mostly responsible for citrus, lemony tastes and smells. However, as a typical component of sativas and sativa hybrids, it is also known for its mood boosting effects. So carts are back and better than ever thanks to our friends at DMV Organics. I’ve literally been enjoying this cart for a week straight and love it so much I’ve not used anything else. I’d recommend enjoying this cart on lower temperature settings, which will yield a lighter more flavorful toke. I’ve found it to be a tasty, energetic, uplifting experience. The carts are strong, but I think the nature of the Orange Crush makes them great for daytime use. Let us know in the comments what you think! We’d love to hear your feedback!! PS: Get $15 off your order with promo code "TokerGuideRef"!

Ruh-roh, I'm interrupting your regularly scheduled program to let you know that there is some epic weed flowing through Top Secret DC right now. It's called Scooby Snacks and it's so good it'll have you saying Zoinks - you know, like Shaggy. Scooby Snacks the strain is a slightly indica heavy hybrid cross of the original Girls Scout Cookies and Face Off OG. However, I hear that this one is actually LA Cookies in the cross making it both lean more toward the middle and giving it an even more eye catching appearance. This comes as no surprise as Top Secret has mentioned to me several times their soon-to-be "Genetics" project would be "sexy AF". After taking in the first specimen in this lineup, you can call me a believer. The aroma, taste, and power are there too. It's just such a sexy batch of bud - I have to be honest. It might be the best tree I've had in several months. It's a jar dominator and it'll make even the most seasoned tokers choke up a little...and that's probably with tears too because it's so damn near perfection. It's crispy to the touch, yet annoyingly sticky. The flavor is super hard to place. Is it a skunky biscuit? Are those notes of peanut butter cookie? Then there's the trichomes - hyper white and stacked to the limit. Just check the macro: Anyhow, this is one for the ages...and the record books. Wait, are there record books? If so this one should win for "Most likely to make you sporadically quote Scooby-Doo catch phrases". I know I'd sure do a lot for one of these Scooby Snacks! Overall, it should be no mystery as to why I've used all the hyperbole above. This weed has all the puppy power you need and then some. Do yourself a favor and hit up Top Secret DC, jump in your Mystery Machine, and grab some Scooby Snacks ASAP.

I hope everyone out there in the Tokerverse is having a great weekend! I wanted to take a moment to highlight some simply delightful edibles I've been thoroughly enjoying recently called Trailblazers Edibles. Their line is carried by our good friends over at Joint Delivery and, for me, they are really doing it right. Admittedly, I'm not the biggest edible fan. This is, for the most part, because I inhale cannabis at fairly regular intervals and edibles have been somewhat unpredictable for me in their onset and intensity in the past. I've def. been spaced out on some space cake several hours after I thought I was feeling it - maybe not the best state to be in for an important dinner meeting. Especially one where I'm expected to sample concentrate 🤦‍♂️ . Nevertheless, the Trailblazer line appealed to me because the first three products I was presented with are some of my favorite flavors of sweets: apple pie, peanut butter & honey, and marshmallow. These weren't your standard brownie, sucker, and rice crispy treat like you see pretty frequently in DC, these were fairly unique and seemingly delectable treats - how could I not indulge? The Apple Pie Bite, described as homemade apple pie with crunchy streusel topping, at 200mg THC was scary good. I say scary because that is not the biggest "bite" and it was insanely good, so one has to be extremely careful not to over do it. I recommend portioning with a knife. This made just the perfect little after dinner treat on Friday night! After Friday night's experience, when Saturday rolled around, I was more than ready to check out the Apple Pie Marshmallow. Like a gooey marshmallow rolled in cinnamon, sugar, and apple spice, this was also a treat I cherished. At 50mg THC I still had to be a little careful here, but splitting it in half was no problem. I wonder what it would be like as a s'more? 😲 For me the buzz that accompanied both the apple pie bite and marshmallow was very enjoyable and, yet, different than some other, more sedative edibles I've had. I'd say they do a great job of creating their cannabis infused honey and coconut oil, which are listed as ingredients on these items. Novice cannabis cooks and confectioners often have difficulty with the cannabis infusion process. Too much heat or too long of a duration and concentration levels of, and conversion to, other cannabinoids occurs. For instance, at higher heat you can get high CBN conversion rates. This isn't necessarily terrible, but it does lead to lethargy and other, less desirable effects. Another pro tip is not to grind the plant matter you're turning into edibles too fine as it can create a hashy or grassy taste in the oil (and eventual product). Last, but certainly not least, is the infused honey peanut butter. Oh my! I just love, love, love this stuff. You can spread it on all kinds of things and it makes them SO good. It's 100 mg so it can pack a punch if you need it to, but with the spreadability of peanut butter, it's so easy to just do a spread here and a spread there without getting carried away. I really want to start keeping a supply of this on hand regularly - my new edible go-to! Whether you're into edibles, want to unwind smoke free, or just looking for something to jazz up your next dinner party, these gifts will certainly impress. For all of the Trailblazer line and more be sure to hit up Joint Delivery ASAP!

There's weed that smells specifically like the particular fruit for which it's named, and then there's weed that smells better than the fruit for which it's named. This Papaya strain from Top Secret DC falls into the latter category in my opinion. It certainly smells LIKE papaya. The truth is, however, I don't really like the actual smell of papaya the fruit that much. It's a little skunky and I don't really want that in my fruit. Personally, there are just other fruits that I would prefer given the choice. When it comes to weed, on the other hand, I definitely like skunky. A lot. I also like fruity. A lot. Combine the two and turn the aroma volume up to maximum and you have this batch of Papaya. It's insanely fruity - and i'm totally into it! From appearances alone the buds are immediately eye-grabbing and will stand out in a pack of other samples. It's the mega bright green and insane amount of trichome coverage that makes any cannabis fan give pause and say "Oooh, what's that one!" Then, of course, as soon as you take it out of the bag, BOOM there's that knock your socks off fruity aroma. In structure and cure, the utmost professionalism is abundantly apparent. It snaps sharply, but while brittle to the touch on the edges, it's still highly sticky through the center. Breaking it up by hand you'll experience the "good" problem of having dry kief from the outer parts sticking to your fingers from the fresher, stickier trichomes on the inner parts. Get the grinder out! Ripping a tube of Papaya is the way to go for sure. The funky fruitiness shines all the way through. You'll also find joints mega mouthwatering, but give it a little time to breath after you break it up and before you roll to ensure you don't get a clogged pull from the overt stickiness. Hailing from famed Nirvana Seeds - it's their 25th anniversary year btw (what a year to have that) - Papaya is a cross of Citral #13 and Ice #2. It is highly indica heavy and known for its sedative effects, but the "feels" are also obviously alive with this batch as euphoria dominates and you'll find the tingles rushing around your body fluidly. I would say nighttime is probably the best timeframe for her use, however, one could make a strong case for post strenuous exercise as well. If you're looking to fill your coffers with something of exceptionally exotic fruity flavor and aroma, something that will completely dominate the smell of everything else in your stash jar to the point where you finally just put it in it's own jar because everything else started to taste like it...this is that something. Hit up Top Secret DC today and get your hands on some Papaya before it's sold out!

Greetings Tokers! Jeremy Rider here with another great flower offering from our friends at DMV Organics, an all organic local DC i71 compliant service provider. Gelato-41, also known as “Bacio”, is an award winning indica leaning hybrid bred by Connected Cannabis Co which famously took first place for indica at the first legal High Times California Cannabis Cup. A cross of the famous Sunset Sherbet and Thin Mint Cookie strains, it typically boasts a 25%+ THC level - a highly potent flower to say the least! Tokers seem to universally agree that while immensely strong, Gelato-41 doesn’t cloud the mind, making it an ideal daytime flower for your enjoyment. It's mood boosting energetic body high is also quite relaxing and great for combating paranoia or anxiety. As the science of horticulture advances, it is wonderful that Tokers can benefit from strains specific to their respective medicinal and recreational needs. With everything going on in the world, a strain that doesn’t exacerbate anxious feelings is always a welcomed addition to my collection. This batch sways in coloration from light green to deep purple buds, but regardless of color, the trichomes are exceptionally pronounced in size and brilliance. With a sweet, earthy nose intertwined with hints of lavender, pine, fruit, and citrus you’ll likely find it’s flavor similar in delectability and variety to its eponymous dessert. So what could possibly make this experience any better?!? The fact that for a limited time, our friends at DMV Organics are providing all us Tokers with a discount code (Get $15 off your order with promo code "TokerGuideRef") BUT make sure you don’t buy all of it because I’m almost out!! What did you think about this strain? How did you enjoy it? What did you pair it with? Let us know in the comment section! We’d love your feedback!